“Historians and scholars have access to every issue of every newspaper and journal written during the civil rights struggle of the 1960s, but can access only a comparative handful of papers covering the election of Barack Obama.” — Jeffrey Zeldman

“Along with the list of nine drugs found in her system, Anna Nicole Smith's autopsy report also bizarrely reveals that her 'anus is unremarkable.'”

“This breaking news story is about the sudden, unexpected, and tragic death of a young woman, not to mention the family that she leaves behind.

[...]

Oh, there were many things that this woman, so deserving of our undivided attention tonight, did not do. No, she didn't take off her clothes for a men's magazine for a big payday, work as an exotic dancer or marry a billionaire customer who was 63 years older than her. Nor did she spend most of her adult life pursuing that billionaire's estate in courtrooms from Texas to Washington, D.C., or record her life for a reality TV show, or abuse drugs, or give birth to a child whose paternity is the focus of a legal battle.

[...]

Yesterday, Jennifer Parcell was supporting combat operations in Al Anbar province when she was killed in action. If we had more information about her death, we would provide it. But here at Attytood, we don't have the millions of dollars in resources or the extra manpower that they have at CNN, or MSNBC, or Fox News.” — Will Bunch

“The pork -- together with left-over human flesh -- was later made into SAUSAGES and sold to an unsuspecting public, detectives fear.” — Emily Smith

“The realization that we could now know how we were going to die had changed the world: people became at once less fearful and more afraid. There's no reason not to go skydiving if you know your sliver of paper says BURIED ALIVE. The realization that these predictions seemed to revel in turnabout and surprise put a damper on things.

[...]

Machine of Death is an upcoming published anthology of short stories edited by Ryan North, Matthew Bennardo, and David Malki !, inspired by this episode of Ryan's Dinosaur Comics.

We are actively soliciting short story submissions for the book.”

“I have convinced myself that the way to deal with grief and hardship, the way to be The Good Husband and The Good Father is to be tough and logical and pragmatic. To be stronger than the problem. To keep it inside. I imagine that I'm not the only man like this. That suit seems to fit right off the rack.” — Jim Coudal